Title: Older Women Don’t Giggle: Memoirs of a Renaissance Man
Author: K Charles Oelfke, 2nd
Publisher: The Reading Glass Books
ISBN: 979-8894791937
Pages: 198
Genre: Memoir / Non-Fiction
Reviewer: Susan Brown
Hollywood Book Reviews
The French have a beautiful phrase they use to capture the essence of a quality or attribute that is indescribable: je ne sais quoi. Literally it means, “I do not know what.” This phrase, one I learned a long time ago in my high school French class, kept creeping into my thoughts as I read Mr. Oelfke’s beautiful memoir about his remarkable life-long love affair with all things French, and predominately the enigmatic women, “la femme d’un certain âge, (FCA)” he adored; translated, women of a certain age of. What was it about them that so fascinated him?
Well, these “women of a certain age” had what I would define “je ne sais quoi.” But, after reading this memoir, I have a greater understanding of why the author is showcasing them. He writes that their attributes include being “striking, intriguing, sure of herself, sometimes even breathtaking. She radiates that certain something, which can best be described as fascinating – excluding sex at every step.”
By the author’s definition, a FCA is a woman who has matured “in body and mind,” always, for him, an older woman … not elderly at all, but someone who has lived life, who is wise, experienced, worldly and, of great importance, a skilled lover. Mr. Oelfke’s fascination with FCA’s began early for him, smitten with a close family friend he saw on summer road trips to visit family in Kansas from his home in New York. She was, of course, older. After high school, he was accepted to the Massachusetts Institute of Technology from which he graduated with a degree in architecture. A Fullbright grant sent him to Paris, France to study; he stayed for the next 20 years.
Of his life, he says, “I have lived an extraordinary life full of adventure, business experiences, travel, and excitement, interspersed with marvelous romantic, erotic experiences.” Much of this narrative reflects that. He details his extensive travels throughout Europe as a young, frugal student, art enthusiast, what would today be considered a foodie, a devotee of FCAs and an unequivocal lover of Paris, so much so one chapter in this memoir his love letter to the “City of Love.” He writes, “Paris had become like a female acquaintance, wheedling her way into my heart, into my brain, into my very being.”
Older Women Don’t Giggle is a delightful memoir. Mr. Oelfke is an engaging writer and has done a marvelous job recapping what was, clearly, an amazingly fulfilling life. He is witty, reflective, honest and very genuine. His enthusiasm about Paris and all of Europe is palpable. It clearly was an incredible time to work and live as an American in Paris. In fact, although his life doesn’t mirror the 1950s movie, the author does live for a while at a popular hotel, St. Thomas d’Aquin where he meets other expatriates — actors, writers, foreign correspondents and broadcasters. It was an electrifying time. He reflects, “I feel today that I was fortunate to have lived the final days of Paris’ extraordinary post-World War II period, known as the Golden Years, 1945 to 1975.”
After years of working for a world-famous industrial designer, he decided to move on, “I wasn’t looking for another job. I was looking for another life, one that would be so full of newness and discovery that I would not look back but always ahead.”He books a cross-Atlantic cruise from France to Brazil where fortuitously he “landed my lifelong FCA on the high seas, even before I landed in my new country.” So, as he comes to the end of his story he says, “Here I am, eighty plus years later, remembering and writing about those days, and the same feelings return as if it were yesterday.”
That’s the beauty of a memoir. You get a peek into the lives of extraordinary people. Mr. Oelfke is unquestionably one such person, a truly cultured Renaissance man. Through candid storytelling and philosophical insight, Oelfke reflects on relationships, culture, aging, and the many roles he has played throughout his remarkable life. At once humorous and poignant, this book celebrates experience, self-discovery, and the enduring complexity of the human spirit.